Busy, busy, busy. Everyone here is busy—too busy to help me with my blog or take my picture, or even give me a bath, which, as you can imagine, is totally boring for me. So today I went shopping. On the Internet. With no money. Would that be Windows shopping? I wanted to look at all the new styles, get a leg up on fashion trends. I could search for something fashionable, but not too provocative (although my diet is working like a charm). Maybe something asymmetrical. Pink. Sparkly, even. PetSmart, being “big box,” would carry the standards, but I wanted something cutting edge, slick, boutique-y. So I Googled “cat apparel.” Most of the returns were for cats on clothing, not in it, but I did find one that touted “luxury and designer cat apparel at the Gilded Paw.” Very promising indeed.

Here I must complain. Without question, cats are much more chic and sophisticated than dogs right out of the gate, so why do they get all the cool attire? Witness the Gilded Paw’s Cat Vests and Coats. If I put these on, I’d find myself saying “Howdy, pardner” or “It’s elementary, my dear Watson.” Words that are not in a cat’s vocabulary! But go to the dog dress section and you get some stylish outfits like this kicky pink camo frock or this sweet little black dress. Here’s a glittery Spandex evening gown that would show off my newly defined curves to perfection, and I just adore this sizzling tangerine organza number. Then there’s this to-die-for Emma Rose creation in black velvet with marabou trim and real Swarovski crystals! All for dogs! On the other hand (and I do hate to admit this), a chihuahua and I might have a few anatomic similarities. I just might be able to slip into a Medium. And I’ll definitely have to accessorize.